FRISCO, Texas – Still too soon. The pain of Marshawn Kneeland's death and just how his passing occurred last Thursday still is pulpable throughout The Star and the Dallas Cowboys organization.
Cowboys COO Stephen Jones addressed this unimaginable tragedy first on his Monday radio segment, stressing how all will "miss him so much."
Then owner Jerry Jones did so for the first time on his Tuesday radio segment, speaking to "how devastated" everyone is and that "we all are having to share the sorrow."
And here at The Star on Wednesday, Cowboys head coach Brian Schottenheimer addressed the media for the first time, his tone still quite somber and his pain readily evident, in his face and through his words.
Schottenheimer offered these opening thoughts, becoming the first team official to speak of Tuesday night's private memorial service to honor the life of the 24-year-old Marshawn Kneeland, limited to the Cowboys players, coaches, support staff, family and friends brought in for the ceremony and those in the organization connected to the football side of the building.
"Like to offer my condolences to Marshawn's family, Catalina, his girlfriend," he began. "We had an opportunity last night to celebrate Marshawn's life, tell some stories, share, laugh, cry. Marshawn loved the words 'one love,' so we talked a lot about love as we grieve and had a chance to really share a couple of things that I'll miss the most about Marshawn. A couple of things, he had the most playful spirit of any young man I've been around. His smile could take you to your knees, and in terms of an athlete, no one had a better motor than his.
"My heart is heavy; our team's heart is heavy. We don't move on. We do move forward."
Only then did Schottenheimer open his Wednesday press conference to questions.
But just six days since Kneeland committed suicide, according to police officials, seemed almost too soon to think about football. Under normal circumstances, Schottenheimer would have been questioned about which injured players are scheduled to return to practice on Thursday for the first time since the Cowboys entered last week's bye, like safeties Malik Hooker and likely Donovan Wilson; about having placed Juanyeh Thomas (migraine headaches) on the reserve/non-football injury list.
Schotty would have been asked about the possibility of how much DeMarvion Overshown and Shavon Revel, just activated off reserve injury lists to the 53-man roster on Tuesday, would play Monday night against the Las Vegas Raiders. And for sure what's in store for the trade-deadline acquisitions of defensive tackle Quinnen Williams and linebacker Logan Wilson.
And probably was time to ask about those 2-7 Raiders coming up in Vegas and the likes of Ashston Jeanty from right here in Frisco around the corner at Lone Star High School, the sixth pick in the first round out of Boise State, for sure of local media interest.
Well, that's for another day, probably Thursday's press conference, with the Cowboys returning to practice for the first time since all that off time during the bye week and Marshawn's tragedy.
Those shots could wait.
• How To Handle: Have said this many times over the past six days, for Schottenheimer, a first time head coach, there is no chapter in the head coaching manual of playing football of how to handle something as tragic as this. Something that affects your entire team, coaching staff, training staff, equipment room, doctors, personnel department, front office, people like us and the sweet ladies serving food in the Training Table. "There is no playbook, there's really not," Schottenheimer pointed out. "That's where the late nights come in. The biggest thing for me is being strong for our football team. We've got an incredible locker room. That's where the culture is that we're trying to build. We are bonded more than any of us ever have."
• Raw Emotion: "It's a process, you know. It's been a lot of conversations with people that are clearly more experts than I am dealing with grief," a somber Schottenheimer said while answering his first question. "The problem that happens, we're all on a bye. You're making phone calls, and you're trying to make sense of things, and you're not together. And you're always stronger together, and we are stronger together. So Monday we set up a chance to be together, share, talk. And, of course, we offered some people to sort through what we're feeling and the emotions of what we were feeling. (Tuesday) we had what we called a brotherhood breakfast where we sat down for 45 minutes, we just ate together, where we shared and talked, laughed, cried. And then last night, I think the vigil was beautifully done, beautifully done, difficult as you could imagine. Couple of our players spoke. It's the one thing that, Catalina, his girlfriend, it was very important to her. And, of course, these guys were incredible, and so they showed up in droves to support her."
• Ways to Remember: Not only did the Cowboys organization have memorial cardshanded out at the candlelight vigil, complete with Marshawn's photo, and handed out pins with Marshawn's No. 94 on them, but also pointed out the team would wear decals on their helmets. And there would be more. "Again, we're going to honor Marshawn, his family, a number of different ways," Schottenheimer said. "The organization has been amazing. We're going to start a Marshawn Kneeland Memorial Fund where we can all give and support. Catalina, she's pregnant, make sure she's taken care of, and the baby is taken care for the rest of their lives. That's very important to them and important to us. … We'll make the right decisions; we have time to make those decisions.
• Short Thoughts: Throughout the NFL Week 10 games, all home teams provided a moment of silence in memory of Marshawn, including Thursday night, the Sunday games, the Sunday night game and the Monday night game, too, Schottenheimer saying of the NFL, "This is a special league." … Also touching around here, both the Stars and Mavericks provided moments of silence to honor Marshawn's life prior to the national anthem before both of their most recent home games … And believe it or not, with the Cowboys on their bye, and know the players were not in the building as a team from Wednesday of last week through Sunday, but as Schottenheimer pointed out, "The one thing that helped, I think, a lot of these guys was being on the bye. Most of them were with people that they loved, family members, and I know I hugged my kids, my wife. That eases the pain."
And not sure after all Brian said on Wednesday, there is a "last word" needed this week. The head coach sufficiently covered it all, a credit to him, football taking a back seat at least until returning to practice on Thursday.
